Centerfold
by UltravioletPinkRanger
Summary: Draco gets a surprise when he show up at work for the day.


AN: Hello :) I know it's been forever since I posted something, and you're probably wishing this was an update on one of my other stories and not a one-shot, but I needed to get this out my system. I got the idea while listening to the song Centerfold by the J. Geils Band. It's fun and it's 80s- you should listen to it. Anyway, hope you like it.

Draco knew something was odd the moment he walked into his department at the ministry. People were looking at him- no they were _staring _at him. It wasn't that this never happened, in fact it happened quite often. It was just that it was usually the females gawking at him, and in this instance his fellow male coworkers were the ones with their eyes fixed on his persona.

They weren't just looking either. They were smiling at him, and giving him nods of approval for something he didn't know he'd done to be approved. A few had patted him on the back too, and even whistled.

_What is going on here? _He thought, confused about all the attention. He would've stopped and asked, but he was already a couple minutes late for his meeting with the other aurors in his department, and being that he was in charge that day he needed to get there as soon as possible. He'd get his answers later.

He had just reached the auror conference room when he was stopped yet again. "Malfoy you are one lucky bastard!" Someone whose name Draco couldn't recall yelled from down the hall. He refrained from asking the man why exactly he was a lucky bastard and pushed open the door to the room.

There was a flurry of motion once he stepped inside. Everyone had been speaking animatedly it seemed until he had walked in. Now it was deadly quiet and all the men looked anxious.

Draco caught Ron fretfully trying to hide a pile of magazines behind one of the potted plants in the corner of the room, and then he heard Blaise whisper to him not so quietly, "You should have used a vanishing spell you idiot!"

There was obviously something going on that Draco was not currently privy to, unlike the rest of the ministry apparently. But they had important business to attend to, and interesting news would just have to come later.

He made his way to the front of the room, and using his wand had the main points they would be discussing that day appear on the board. "Alright then, let's begin. As you know Potter's on his mission in Germany and won't be with us for the rest of the week, and therefore I'll be delegating. Now, Zabini, what's the update on the Bronson case?"

"I have located him and his stash of dark artifacts. We will need to assemble a team to apprehend him,"

"Great. Orin, Langden, and Holt, you three will be Zabini's team. Prepare to leave by tonight on Zabini's orders. Understood?"

"Yes sir," Orin and Langden responded, but Holt seemed to not have heard anything. Draco stared at the young man waiting for him to answer, but his eyes and mind seemed to be concentrated on something in his lap.

"Langden?" Draco called to him, but he still didn't answer. "LANGDEN!"

Langden's head shot up and caught the glare of his blonde haired superior.

"Is there something down there more interesting than what I have to say?" Draco hissed.

Langden's cheeks reddened, and he shrank down in his seat. "N- no sir,"

"Are you sure about that? Cause I said your name twice and you didn't even acknowledge it. Clearly there is something more important than catching dark wizards. Come on. show the rest of us what it is," Draco beckoned.

Nervously, Langden pulled out a glossy magazine and laid it on the table in front of him. Draco noticed how Blaise and Ron stiffened at the sight.

"A magazine?" Draco raised his eyebrows. "Would you like to share with us the article that had you so enthralled?"

Langden's entire head was colored like a tomato. "Not particulary," he said meekly.

"I think a better question would be if _you_ would like to share what's in the, ah, 'article'," one of the other aurors commented with a snicker, at which everyone else except for Ron, Blaise, and Draco tried to stifle a laugh.

"Lincoln!" Blaise yelled at him in admonishment.

"Excuse me?" Draco said confused, looking from his mates to the other aurors.

"Ignore him Draco, it was nothing of consequence," Blaise said anxiously, trying to rectify the situation.

"No, I want to know what's going on. People have been acting strange around me ever since I got here- is there something about me in that magazine?"

"No, why would you think that?" Ron said, but his voice had gone up an octave. Blaise glared at him.

Draco frowned. "_Accio magazine!_"

"No, mate!" Blaise shouted, and he grabbed on to the magazine before it could land in Draco's hands.

"Give it to me Zabini!"

"NO!"

They began to wrestle with each other, with Draco trying to snatch the magazine away from Blaise, and Blaise trying his hardest to keep it away. Unfortunately, Draco's grip was stronger and he was able to rip it away from his friends fingers.

"Try and take it from me and I will not hesitate to hex you," Draco warned.

"Don't open it mate, you don't want to," Blaise gave his own warning, but Draco ignored him and opened up the magazine.

He should have listened.

There in the centerfold was his fiancé clad in a solid Slytherin green bikini. She had her head resting in the palm of one of her hands, her curly hair perfectly draped around it. One of her legs was straddling a Quidditch broomstick, as if she were riding it, even though she was lying down. In her free hand she was holding on to the golden snitch, it's wings spread out and fluttering. She was smirking, something she had picked up from him, and she was doing it with more seduction than even he could muster.

He could feel his face slowly tautening with anger, his jaw clenching, and his eyes widening the longer he looked at the page in front of him. Yet he couldn't look away.

Draco's breath was caught in his throat as he turned the page. The next one was of her too, wearing a red, shimmery monokini, with her arms holding a beater's stick above her head, and one of her hips thrust to the side.

He turned the page to find another one of her, and then another one.

When he finally looked up all the other auror's eyes were on him, and Ron visibly gulped.

"Ginny Potter's in there too," Lincoln said, deciding to break the silence. "But she's married. So the question still stands Draco, would you like to _share_ what's in-" He didn't get to finish his sentence however, for Blaise had already shot across the table and clasped his hands around his neck to shut him up.

Draco said nothing. He simply shut the magazine and walked out of the conference room. He'd let Blaise deal with Lincoln, because at the moment he had someone else he had to talk to.

He marched over to her office, ignoring all of the anxious looks he was getting from the workers he passed. He hardly even noticed that there was anyone around him, for if they happened to be in his angry path they hurriedly scrambled out of his way.

The moment he reached her door he forcefully pulled it open, causing her head to snap up from being bent over a pile of paperwork on her desk. Before she could say anything he stomped to the front of her desk and slammed the magazine in front of her, centerfold open, and clearly seen.

"What the _HELL _is this Granger?"

Hermione's Granger's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open as she viewed the double page spread before her, shock written everywhere on her face.

"Oh my god," she said, her eyes still glued to picture of herself.

"My words exactly!" Draco spat, his hands clutching the edge of her desk.

Hermione picked the magazine up with her hands, stretching it in front of her, and bringing it nearer to her face, as if wanting a closer look to make sure she was really seeing what she was seeing. Meanwhile, Draco began to rant.

"I come into work this morning thinking it will be just another day in the auror office- but _no, _everyone's whispering and giving me winks and patting me on the back, and I had no clue in hell as to what it was all about. Then I get to my daily meeting with all the others in the department and Weasley's busy trying to gather up all of these magazines before I walk into the room. I had to wrestle this one from Blaise in order to find out what all the fuss was about, and lo and behold there's my fiancé in the middle of bloody _Quidditch Illustrated: Swimsuit Edition_!"

She let the magazine slip out of her grasp and back onto her desk, then she covered her face with her hands. "Ughh, it wasn't a dream," she groaned.

"What wasn't a dream?" Draco asked, his voice getting higher in pitch. "Do you often dream about posing in scanty swim wear and having it published on pages forty and forty-one of a magazine? Oh, and don't forget pages forty-two through forty-four!"

"There's more?" Hermione shrieked, reopening the magazine to find what she had missed. She glimpsed herself gracing the other three pages, then set her head against her desk and moaned in despair.

"When did you even have time to do this photo-shoot, and more importantly, _why_ didn't I know about it?" Draco continued to bellow, his hands flying through the air.

"Please stop yelling at me Draco," Hermione grumbled, not answering his question. "I'm currently developing a massive headache and you're not helping,"

Draco sighed, and ran a hand through his hair. There were a few moments of silence before he spoke again. "I'm sorry," he apologized. He wouldn't go as far to say that he had gone overboard with his reaction, but it was obvious from the moment he stepped into her office that she had no idea about the magazine, and he really didn't need to shout at her. He took a breath and then continued. "I'm just surprised is all, and I really want to know what would've compelled you to do something like this,"

"Lots of alchohol," Hermione admitted finally, and Draco stared at her with a raised eyebrow.

"But, you never drink," he said. "As I recall you saying, _'I want to keep all my brain cells intact, thank you very much,'_"

"Well Ginny convinced to take a chance for one night,"

"I knew the Weaselette had something to do with this, considering she's on the three pages before yours,"

"What?" Hermione shrieked, once again opening the magazine. Sure enough, Ginny was on said pages, also wearing bikinis that left nothing to the imagination. "It's a good thing Harry's on a mission in Berlin. You're entire department might've been obliterated if he saw them looking at this,"

"They're lucky _I'm _not doing anything to them for looking at your pictures," he scoffed. "You're not allowed anywhere near Lincoln by the way. Anyway, back to how in the world you ended up in the middle of this magazine. The _whole _story please,"

"Fine," she said, taking a breath before beginning. "While Ginny and I were in Paris, she decided that since it was going to be my last vacation with her as a single woman that I should have all the fun that I could- and I already told you about all those nightly escapades she took me on,"

"Yes you did, but you failed to mention this particular one," Draco interrupted.

"_This particular one_," Hermione continued, ignoring him, "Happened four days into our trip, and she convinced me to have one drink… which then multiplied into six. The next thing I clearly remembered was waking up the next morning in our hotel room with no recollection of the night before. I did, however, remember having this strange dream where Ginny and I were asked by these two guys to pose for their sports magazine, and before I could protest Ginny accepted. I didn't tell Ginny about the dream because I was afraid that it might've been real, and when she didn't mention anything about it I assumed that I had in fact been dreaming. Obviously I was wrong,"

"_Obviously,"_ Draco said through clenched teeth.

"Well that's the end of my story," Hermione finished with a sigh. "I'm sorry, Draco. I know you're family won't be happy about this, seeing as how much they _love_ me already,"

"I don't care about my family Hermione, you know that," he said, sitting on the side of her desk. "What I do care about is the men at this ministry, and the rest of the wizarding world, getting the chance to ogle you whenever they please. Who knows the things their doing and imagining while looking at this," he shuddered.

"There's nothing we can do about it now Draco. It will pass just like everything else about us that has shown up in the press. Besides, who cares what they're doing? All they have is a picture of me- you get the real thing," Hermione smirked.

"That I do," Draco laughed, taking her hands in his and lifting her out of her chair. He pulled her close to him so that their noses were nearly touching and then wrapped his arms around her waist. "I get you for the rest of my life,"

"And if you're good I might let you take pictures of me for your own personal magazine,"

"Sounds like an amazing idea," Draco said before capturing her lips in a kiss.

They were interrupted less than a minute later when someone barged in.

"HERMIONE WE HAVE A BIG PROBLEM," Ginny said as she closed the door behind her, not paying any attention to who was in the room. "DRACO AND HARRY ARE GOING TO _MURDER _OUR AS-"

Ginny froze as she finally noticed Draco next to Hermione. "Oh, hello Draco," she smiled sweetly, a blush crawling up her cheeks.

"Hi Ginny," Draco responded, trying not to chuckle. "I suppose I should get back to my office and take care of things up there," he said turning back to Hermione. "Though I'm sure Ron and Blaise have already done the best they can to save everyone's hides,"

"Alright then," Hermione smiled. Draco pressed a quick kiss to her forehead before heading towards the door.

"Nice keeper swimsuit by the way," Draco commented to Ginny with a wink. "I'm not sure Harry will appreciate it though,"

The door promptly slammed behind him, barely missing his bum.

When he returned to his office, Blaise was sitting in his leather chair, a pile of magazines stacked nicely to the side.

"So do you still have a fiancé?" Blaise asked.

"Of course I still have a fiancé. Now get out of my chair,"

"Weasley and I collected all of them we could," Blaise said as he stood up and allowed Draco to take his rightful spot. "Though I'm sure there are still a few stragglers out there,"

"I know. I ripped one out of Sharp's hands on my way back up,"

"What do you want me to do with all of these?" Blaise gestured to the pile.

"Throw them in the fire."

Blaise nodded his head, and then using his wand sent the magazines up in the air and shooting towards the fireplace at the other end of the room. Quickly Draco grabbed one as it sped past him, and then watched as the others settled into the flames of the pit and disintegrated into ash.

Blaise eyed him curiously as he held onto the final magazine.

"What?" Draco said innocently, as he opened the magazine up so that it showed the one picture everyone had been making a fuss over. Although he didn't want anyone else looking at it, he really couldn't blame them if they did.


End file.
